Into a better me!?

Been here in Brisbane for 3 months... not sure why, i felt that I have changed. To a better me? I am not sure... will see how I go through this year...

So... How have I changed? Let's me sort out....

Perhaps I have known myself better now.. Afraid of rejection / Afraid of feeing insecure / Afraid being alone... I suppose these are common. But, if you started to see your weakness and admit it, I guess you deal with it better! And when I looked at Antony... he gave me a very strong courage. He live very happy alone. So busy with his live yet happy. So, when I felt sad/bad, i will try to get more busy, meet up friends, watching movies... writing down my feeling (in blog).. these are all making me feel better.... And love myself more and more! Just like to treat myself better... white wine before bed is the best!

Now that I have felt better... but, I am started to get scare of myself being so used to alone. Perhaps, I really should have just get used to alone... and be alone. .....???

Leaving Brisbane

Came in early to the airport... sitting at the food court waiting for time to check in... It's been 3 months since i am here in Brisbane. And just like normal, when you are about to leave, everybody seems to be a good friends to you and it's so hard to say goodbye... oh... oh.. oh... I should have get so used to it by now... but, it's just always the same feeling... i guess i am fairly emotion! :)

OK.. time to have some small recall of my days in Brisbane..

People
1) Got to know Antony from work.. my lovely personal tour guide... he's too comfortable to be alone.. and still prefer to be alone. My weekends were so much easier with him around... love him... ! He will be the most memorable person that I have in Brisbane.
2) Got to know John from gumtree.. a person craving for sex... but lovely person.. you will feel very comfortable with him around, and you will always feel secure when he is around (only when he is around though !). Even if we bump into his friends... you would not feel being "ignore" and alone... this feeling was so good...
3) Ken from work... another lovely person from America... he stressed up during work and don't you ever mess around with him when you are at work...you will get slap left and right even by trying to give some hands to help up !!! He is so crazy for SALSA.
4) VJ from work.. a guy who don't know what he wants.. and doesn't take things seriously when he has to.. well, maybe not, but he just doesn't know where is the border... always crossed the line and got scold by me ! Ha.

Place
1) SouthBank. My favorite place to have a nice one hour walk... Artificial Beach, Small Garden, Mini Rain Forest... all along the nice river.
2) Byron Bay. Rough rough rough.... rough current... first time i have ever swim in such a rough ocean. To me it is something very different, but everybody else was just taking it so normal.. !?
3) Stradbroke island. Stuck by sea life the first moment i started to swim... ewww.... bad experience.
4) Wild N Wet. Awesome. Like the Tornado. ! Awesome!
5) Great Barrier Reef. Beautiful Corals... maybe the best that I have ever seen... but a bit too scary to dive as it was too huge and you can get lost easily, especially when you have a bad/naughty dive buddy.

Christmas Holiday:- Day 3~10 (Edinburgh)

Dec 24. Shopping + Wrapping + Shopping + Wrapping... it's all about getting the left-out christmas gift and gift wrapping. Nothing much going on today.

Dec 25. Christmas day... finished the unfinished wrapping and mmm... can't exactly remember where I went during the day time. But at night, we all have the Christmas gift distributing exercise. The whole family was so happy unwrapping the gift. I got chocolate and chocolate again and some warm pajama to keep me warm in the cold winter time. Love it. :)

Dec 26. Boxing day... Martin was doing some shopping today. Get some jeans, belt, shoes and so proud of his 32 waist size jean. I spotted a very nice Fendi bag (Fendi is always my favorite), it was only 100 pound, compare to other country, this is so much cheaper. But Martin just walk away and ignore me. It was always a rush with Martin. Or maybe i should say efficient.

We stopped at a italian restaurant to have lunch. I hit again on the bag. And surprisingly, he said he would buy me if I give him a good xxx... i felt so insulted right at that moment! Is he treated me like what Oliv treated the girl in KL? What the fxxxx... I was so angry and just kept myself quiet all the time. (I am not the type of person that go arguing unless i have calmed down myself). Ultimately he got upset cause i didn't even tell him why i get so pissed off with him..... so, there goes the day... What a BOXING day... but anyway, we get sorted out on the evening.

Christmas Holiday:- Day 3~10 (Edinburgh)

Dec 23.. Had a really good slept... but yet, still very tired though. The jetlag was just so terrible. Martin and I went for a walk tour in the town. Chris dropped us at the Calton Hill. An amazing monument with panoramic views of the city. Unfortunately, money ran out half way building it, so it remains unfinished.
We then went to Edinburgh castle. Another great panoramic look. Rented a headset for the historical introduction. It was so full of feeling when you got to know how old the city is. And the oldest building in town just right in front of you.... God... aren't you happy we are alive to see all this!
Another long walk thru the famous Royal Mile all the way down to the Parliament. Sad to hear how much they had spent on building the Parliament, saddest of all, how the building was built. Nothing like Scotland. Anyway, if it was not in Scotland, it probably will be better.

Home for Christmas Dinner. Julie has to work on Christmas, so we had an earlier Christmas dinner. Unlike Chinese tradition, table was set so well. Cracker on every set. First time I had my Christmas dinner. Ohh... lovely. Good things didn't end here. Sheppard pie.... so delicious. Yummy yummy. I can still remember how tasty it was.

Christmas Holiday:- Day 3~10 (Edinburgh)

Dec 22.. Landed at Glasgow airport around 12 noon. The first moment when i stepped out of the airport, all my memory of WINTER in Canada came back. The black water on the road, wet and muddy road. Chris (Martin's brother) picked us up from the airport and straight to Scotland. Glad to see the hilarious Julie and fun loving John again. And their cozy Scottish style house is very different from our Asian living. The moment when I went into the house (where Julie and John is staying, and is also where we will be staying at Scotland), there are 5 doors in a corridor. Just 4 doors and nothing much else. And behind each door is Martin's room, Kitchen, Toilet, Living Room and Julies and John room. Very different yet very cozy too. I especially like Martin's room as it overlook the Church from the Window. Very nice view. I used to just woke up in the morning and look out the cold weather out there... :)
Martin and I went out for a quick walk before the dinner. Walking on the Scotland is a totally different feeling. Every moment is just like a movie scene. The castle. The Nice Church. The house. You don't feel like you are living in a real world, but a movie world. A harry porter world. So amazing.

And then, here come the night mare.... The musical theater. It was a very good musical show, really. But, i was so tired (jetlag), and the moment when i sat down, my head started to knock. And it continue for the next 2 hours. I tried so hard to maintain my head and not allowing it to knock (as Julie was just sitting next to me).... it was such a painful experience. Luckily Martin kept waking me up by pushing my hand....

Busy + Lazy = Enjoy!

It's been a crazy weeks for me. I know it's a short weeks for me here in Brisbane for the last time in this year. I planned out all the weekends just to ensure I made used of all these nice weekend here in Brissy.

Week1 = Byron Bay (My bag got stollen, lost credit cards and shoes)
Week2 = Stradbroke Island (Got stung by jelly fish) + Wet N' Wild in Goldcoast (Awesome)
Week3 = Dive trip to Vanuatu Island (Fabulous)
Week4 = Chilling out here in Brissy for the last time and probably doing some shopping.

But I have been so lazy to put up my blog... it's good to just write down your good memory. So, I hope I can catch up these days on my blog. Will try harder.